We give our own power away to what we resist the most in our lives...whether it is opening the flood gates of grief, living into our magic, befriending shame, healing the soul wound, creating something that is an authentic expression of soul, expressing our truth, asking vulnerable questions to maintain in energetic integrity, revealing our hearts, opening to the unknown, taking leaps, creating something new, trying something new, being a beginner again....all of it. What I notice is how it is resistance itself that creates a backlog of self-doubt and fear, building the fire of shame and feeding the inner frenzy of emotional guests that are not welcome, yet have nowhere else to go. Restistance makes us sick. It creates tension in the body, division in the heart, obsessive thoughts in the mind. Resistance is a strange form of fear with a dash of grief and sometimes righteousness. We resist being human. We resist changing. Resistance is what happens when we follow the pull of what life will bring us deeper into our wholeness, towards the places our soul knows holds seeds of our highest good, greatest potential and the grit that makes for true love and prosperity and health.
Sometimes it shows up when we want to create something. Sometimes when there is something we need to let go of or need to come back to our own center. Many times when there are emotions we are afraid will overwhelm us....fear that our emotions will disempower us, take us under. This is only so because its a back log of big energy we intuit living inside our skins and bones that needs holding and metabolizing. So, we give resistance all this power to hold us back, to protect us, to give us rationality on a pedestal even if it means the soul remains dismembered. Resistance also shows up when we do not feel safe. Fear and not feeling safe are the same thing...we’d prefer to banish fear than admit that we do not feel safe having our human experience or moving towards our grief, unraveling the relational wounds that bind us to father and mother wounds. Self is fluid. You are not a static creation of a brand or color palette or way of being that stays still. That’s scary, but also liberating to know that you are a bold fluctuation of energy and wisdom, bright light and dark shadow that alchemize into your greatest gifts that long to pour forward and paint magnificent landscapes in your life. No more painting yourself in a corner with resistance as the canvas. It doesn’t look good on you. It is preventing you from fully living into what you most fully desire. And, that is the thing...fearing what you most truly desire. Fearing the feeling, the journey, the unfoldment, the unkown...but that is what makes you fluid and beautiful and strong....it makes you real. It makes the journey real, it makes the life you fully long for, the connections your heart most deeply wants to have, the prosperity and beauty that will surround you filled with depth of soul and music of a heart beating to a whole symphony of feelings and expressions and truths. A joyful life is filled with depth and meaning, traverses through the barren desert of resistance and on the other side, a power is discovered within that is beyond what the mind could conjure. A joyful life lives beyond resistance. I know. It’s tough, this surrendering to what we resist the most. I sit now, looking at this year and knowing that the very things I resist are the things I must now relax into, invite in to my life and my heart, to let the grief re-create me once again, to overcome the inertia to create and write and that the living itself is what will make me new. Over and over again. Much love.
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